Is it time for more vulnerable intimacy on TV? Virgin Island might be leading the way

Channel 4 has never been coy about creating eyebrow-raising television, and Virgin Island certainly isn’t the first time the broadcaster has commissioned a rather jaw-dropping concept.

Open House: The Great Sex Experiment first aired in 2022, following couples who head to a luxury retreat where they explored whether having open relationships and sex with other people could strengthen their bond. It was eye-opening, featured sex and relationship experts and put intimacy at the forefront of the conversation – and Virgin Island is doing the same thing.

Having first aired in 2025, the series became a ratings hit, breaking records among 16-to-34-year-olds and was Channel 4’s biggest streaming hit of the year, so it was unsurprising when the renewal news came around.

The reality series follows 12 adult virgins as they head to a Mediterranean retreat under the care of intimacy experts, including lead coaches Celeste Hirschman and Dr Danielle Harel, both co-creators of the Somatica Method which is used on the show.

With two more episodes in this season, there is plenty for Hirschman, Harel and their expanded team of experts to get stuck into – from religious shame and online bullying to body image anxiety. The experts also tackle sexual disorders on the rise among young people, including premature ejaculation, erectile dysfunction and vaginismus.

Along with tackling these sexual issues, the series follows the group on a transformative journey and edges towards moments as intimate as people potentially losing their virginity.

And with a new season, it begs the question: Do we really need to see this all over again? Well, it’s certainly a show worth being optimistic about.

The reaction to season 1 was rather negative, with social media filled with comments from viewers saying they were “creeped out” and “uncomfortable”, particularly during scenes involving surrogate partner therapy, in which participants who choose to do so can engage in intimate exercises – including kissing, nudity and, in some cases, intercourse – with trained surrogates.

Hirschman and Harel have rigorously defended the show since its introduction last year, with the experts telling Radio Times how important and detailed the duty of care for the participants is.

“The duty of care is amazing, and that’s one of the amazing things I love about the structure and the production team and the British TV rules too,” Harel began. “There is really amazing duty of care, people always have someone to reach out to. There’s psychiatrists on the team, in addition to all the professionals [on the show there is] someone on the outside.”

She continued: “So it won’t be a part of the process they’re going through and people always checked on [the participants] before, during and after. There’s dedicated people that they talk to on a weekly basis if they want to.”

Participants themselves have also rejected ideas that they were exploited on the programme, with season 2’s Bertie telling LadBible: “The therapists as well always said, ‘If you don’t want to do this particular thing you do not have to, it’s completely fine.’

“We felt very safe on the programme, we felt very secure and it genuinely was a good time.”

Many of the participants have praised the show, noting it has been a life-changing experience, with it offering a rare chance to focus entirely on their intimacy issues with intensive professional support.

Experts argue that much of the discomfort around Virgin Island stems from the fact that it shows intimacy as messy, awkward and, at times, emotional, rather than smooth and cinematic — something audiences are accustomed to when it comes to seeing sex on television.

As psychosexual dysfunction therapist Shelly Dar argues, the “cringe” viewers feel is a mirror: real sexual vulnerability can be difficult to watch because it activates people’s own shame, discomfort and unresolved feelings.

“We’ve become so accustomed to the polished, performative sex found in porn or scripted dramas that real, awkward sexual vulnerability feels alien,” she told Radio Times. “Viewers aren’t just laughing at the contestants; they are distancing themselves from the terrifying prospect of being that seen and that exposed.”

Dr Lori Beth Bisbey, psychologist, GSRD (gender, sex, relationship diversity) therapist, sex and intimacy coach, makes a similar point: “Viewers find vulnerability difficult to watch. Sexual vulnerability can be more difficult to watch as people often have their own sexual vulnerabilities and the vulnerability highlights the emotional part of intimacy.”

She continued: “On television people seem more inclined to connect with straight physicality as it doesn’t spark off any shame or unresolved feelings for them. As a society, we are not great at talking feelings, responding to feelings and talking about sex, so the programme is more challenging than people expect it to be.”

Virgin Island has begun to open up a conversation that mainstream television often shies away from. Hirschman and Harel repeatedly frame the show as a way to reduce shame, normalise awkwardness and show that intimacy is learned, not magically innate.

Harel told Radio Times that sexuality is often treated as something secretive and shameful, asking why we can watch cooking shows together but struggle to treat sex with the same openness.

Harel explained: “Just thinking about the idea of [it being] personal and secretive, I think that’s part of the shame. It’s not like the idea is, ‘Let’s have sex outside on the streets’, that’s not the point. It’s okay to have privacy around sexuality but there’s something so powerful about seeing people’s transformation and helping it transform other people’s lives. And also, what if we didn’t feel so much shame around sexuality? What if we were allowed to talk about it? People see cooking shows together, why is that not personal?”

Hirschman added that erotic energy shouldn’t be boxed into the bedroom, but understood as something that can move through the whole body and one’s entire life.

She said: “What happens when we don’t actually feel that erotic energy and that aliveness flowing through us all the time is that it actually shuts down. And then when it is time to go to the bedroom, nobody has any of it flowing. To be able to feel it and flow it throughout your throughout your body, throughout your life, I think that creates much more lubrication, as we say, for when you are actually ready to have sex.”

Dar added: “Intimacy deserves more space on television, provided it’s handled with integrity. We have a crisis of loneliness and sexual dysfunction in the UK, often fuelled by silence. If this show moves the conversation from shame to curiosity, it’s doing a service, even if the format is designed to make us squirm.”

Their points are not that sex should be public for the sake of it but that silence has its own cost. As we see in Virgin Island, many adults reach their 20s and 30s with little sexual education, a heavy burden of shame, or sexual disorders that are rarely discussed in detail on television.

Virgin Island is making these experiences visible.

Virgin Island returns on Monday 27 April at 9pm on Channel 4.

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